overwhelmed (at 12.45 a.m)

by a baby who won’t sleep unless i’m right beside him, and by having no idea how i’m going to get more sleep at night

by a three year old that wants my attention constantly

by the house; simply keeping it at a level of functionality (dishes and laundry) let alone the extras (ie.washing the kitchen floor, cleaning the fridge etc etc etc)

by all the books i want to read, the things i want to learn, by everything on the internet; and being reminded on a daily basis that i can’t get to any of it

by trying to even do the bare minimum for my other job (the professional one)

by decisions to be made about how to do life after maternity leave

by how to figure out what’s good for my children when it comes to school

by friendships i want to nurture, and yet feel i have so little to give

by my age-old struggle with feelings of rejection and exclusion in relationships

by the guilt of just NEEDING from my husband all the time, and not finding it in myself to give him what he needs: the recognition for all he does do….all i want is more

by my relationship with food and my body

by my constant confusion about how to parent isaiah around issues of food and eating, among other things

by all the STUFF in our house

by the to do list i never get to

Things always look better in the light of morning, right.? Oh sleep come quickly.

p.s. i almost forgot to mention that i’m also overwhelmed by the death of tim bosma, the ongoing genocide/wars in sudan, syria etc, the boston marathon bombings, and the kermit gosnell evil.

finger painting

i’m disappointed with my lack of blogginess lately, sigh, but this is life these days! we’re off to belleville for mother’s day weekend, so maybe there’ll be some time to write? i’ve got several things i’m working on in my head and would really like to put some thoughts down.

but in the mean time….pictures of aaron’s first finger painting experience!  the reason he has paint on his face is because he would paint for a bit, and then periodically lower his nose and mouth onto the paper. it was very funny to watch.by the end of it he needed a bath:)

one more thing: if you like potatoes and cheesiness, you need to make this recipe, which kyra made for me today.

aaron peter, ten months old

he makes oatmeal look good too:)

with his girlfriends

get plump (i’m already there:))

if you click on the picture it takes you to the great website i found this on (actually, technically the website is horrible, but the content is good–i’m waiting for time to explore it some more)

oh to live in 1891!

Spring Gardening Dates

Reblogged from :

'Tis the season! Time to dust off those gardening gloves, make the most of these warmer days and gather in the garden. Here is the plan for the coming months:

Saturday, April 27
Clean up and Work Bee

9 AM start (with breakfast) - 11:30 crew
11:30 (with lunch) - 2 PM crew

We've got some amazing plans for the garden this year and we need your help to make them a reality.

Read more… 220 more words

excited to be a part of the garden this year!

spring is here!!!!!!

“what’s this mommy?”
“it’s rhubarb.”
“oh, rhudarb”

a surprise crocus

such vibrant green amidst the drab grey and brown

sedum beginning

daffodils-to-be

web stuff of the week! (so far:)

http://www.winnipegfreepress.com/breakingnews/turns-out-happiness-isnt-in-my-pant-size-202890031.html

http://www.floparis.net/  (not, as stephen speculated, twila paris’ daughter)

http://www.coaltrainrailroad.com  (awesome new kids’ music, found free! on noisetrade.com)

http://rainforroots.com/ (the woman from coaltrain railroad singing on an album of folky bible story songs)

saturday night

taxes were filed today, and it seems we’ll end up with a modest refund. yay! double yay that it’s done, especially given the stupid program we were using! and another yay for the time isaiah spent with my brother and sister-in-law. he had no issue going, though it was the first time he’d been on his own, and i think he had a great time. now if only they’d do that every saturday:)

second night of sleep training started well with just a 15 minute cry, but then aaron awoke after only an hour and  it took him 30 minutes to go back down. i had to escape downstairs while stephen waited him out.

pray for my dad if you would. since the e-coli thing, he’s also had a bad gastro kind of virus, and was still feeling run-down today. then tonight we got word he was back in emerg with another fever. kinda scary….

good night all.

friday

1. common table at church tonight was awesome. i like feeling that i’m starting to belong.

2. first night of sleep training aaron has commenced. he persevered for about 45 minutes. sigh….now we’ll see how the rest of the night goes.

3. tomorrow we take isaiah to my brother’s for about 3 hours, so we can finish taxes, among other things.

4. still want to write a post about brene brown, which i’ve been meaning to do for about a month.

5. my baking goal for the weekend is to make coconut bread, which i found on smitten kitchen.

6. aaron pushed himself to his feet at the bottom of the stairs a couple of days ago. to quote isaiah: ‘oh my.’

7. isaiah’s three and a half birthday is next friday. i’ve informed him that once you turn three and a half there are no more diapers. we’re going to make a brown cake with brown and white chocolate chips–his idea. i don’t think he’s going to be pleased when he finds out i’m serious about the diapers. (at canadian tire today he saw a sesame street themed potty seat for a toilet. he wanted to take it home, but i told him he could only if he was going to pee and poop on the toilet. he quickly put it back on the shelf and said ‘maybe later.’)

8. so tired. going to eat haagen dazs with stephen now and then go to bed with isaiah. stephen has to sleep in the same room with aaron, and i’ll just go in for a couple of feedings in the night.

 

cute boy pictures

baby in a box

isaiah’s happy easter

braving the cold last week–and yes i hung some laundry out!

trying out the new bike trailer! now to get the bike ready…

a warm day! isaiah’s working hard, and aaron’s having his first crawl through the grass

i’m dirty but cute:)